Florenza Denise Lee

Award-Winning Author, Publisher, Narrative Coach, Master Storyteller, Radio Talk Show Host

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by Florenza

The Dangers of Expectations and Goals When Used for Self-Sabotage


Setting expectations and goals can be a powerful motivator, but when misused, they can lead to self-sabotage. Here’s how:

  1. Unrealistic Expectations: When we set the bar too high, we set ourselves up for failure. This can lead to feelings of inadequacy and disappointment, which can spiral into a cycle of self-sabotage.
  2. Fear of Failure: High expectations often come with a fear of not meeting them. This fear can paralyze us, causing procrastination or avoidance, ultimately hindering our progress.
  3. Perfectionism: Striving for perfection can be detrimental. It can lead to chronic dissatisfaction and frustration, as perfection is often unattainable.
  4. Negative Self-Talk: When we cannot meet our goals, we might engage in negative self-talk, reinforcing a belief that we are not capable or worthy. This can damage our self-esteem and motivation.
  5. Burnout: Constantly pushing ourselves to meet high expectations without adequate rest can lead to burnout. This affects our mental and physical health and our ability to achieve future goals.

Setting realistic, achievable goals and practicing self-compassion are essential to avoiding these pitfalls. Remember, progress is more important than perfection.